Watch Where You Step

Little hand-painted people, left in London to fend for themselves. Very cool.

Some examples:

Beware Teh Gays!!!

Unbeknownst to most of us, the House Armed Services personnel subcommittee began hearings yesterday—the first in 15 years—to decide the fate of the military's much derided "Don't Ask, Don't Tell" policy. Lucky for us, the Washington Post was there to record the rantings of the lunatic (not-so) fringe.

Choice cuts:

Don't ask, don't tell. And, whatever you do, don't ask Elaine Donnelly [pictured above] to tell you what she thinks about gays in the military.
…
Donnelly treated the panel to an extraordinary exhibition of rage. She warned of "transgenders in the military." She warned that lesbians would take pictures of people in the shower. She spoke ominously of gays spreading "HIV positivity" through the ranks.
…
Inadvertently, Donnelly achieved the opposite of her intended effect. Though there's no expectation that Congress will repeal "don't ask, don't tell" and allow gays to serve openly in the military, the display had the effect of increasing bipartisan sympathy for the cause.

Rep. Vic Snyder (D-Ark.) labeled her statement "just bonkers" and "dumb," and he called her claims about an HIV menace "inappropriate." Said Snyder: "By this analysis . . . we ought to recruit only lesbians for the military, because they have the lowest incidence of HIV in the country."
…
Donnelly was followed by Jones, a tough-talking businessman who suggested that the military's tradition of "selfless service" would be undermined by gay men and lesbians. "In the military environment, team cohesion, morale and esprit de corps is a matter of life and death," he said. His written statement spelled it "esprit decor"; it also warned of "a band of lesbians that harassed new females," and noted his own military experience when "the only way to keep from freezing at night was to get as close as possible for body heat -- which means skin to skin."

But it was Donnelly, founder and president of the Center for Military Readiness, who amused lawmakers the most. Snyder asked Darrah about Donnelly's reference to "passive-aggressive actions common in the homosexual community," saying, "I'm almost tempted to ask you to demonstrate."

Man, when the Bush-ass-kissing Wash. Post is making fun of conservatives, you know there's a sea change coming. Click here for rest of the homophobic fun.

More on the lovely Ms. Donnelly here, here, and here.

I'm Dreaming Of A Blue Thanksgiving

I've been thinking lately about listing my predictions for which states Obama will win this November and compare them to various other media outlets' maps. Well, over at Pollster.com they have made my life a little easier with their latest map of 2008 presidential electoral projections. Here's their map:

By and large, their projections line up with my predictions (unlike other maps). The main difference: my hit is that several of their toss-up states will go to Obama, specifically Virginia, Nevada, and Missouri (which will probably be a squeaker). 

I also think he has a good chance of taking Alaska, though I wouldn't be surprised if he lost by a bit. Montana could go to Obama, though I wouldn't hold my breath. Florida's a strange case. Given the primary fight and the demographics, you'd think it'd be ripe for a McCain win. But I've been reading that tens of thousands of newer, young voters have been registering throughout the year, which is why it's now a toss-up. My bet is Florida turns light blue by fall and goes to Obama by a nose. 

What do you guys think?

A Summit of Fonts

A peek inside the latest typeface conference. 

Religulous

Great news! Bill Maher been making a documentary called Religulous. From the trailer it looks like a hilarious combination of "Jaywalking", Borat, and Roger and Me. I can't embed the trailer, so here's the link. It won't hit theaters until Oct. 3. I can't wait.

He's also set up a website called Disbeliefnet, a parody of Beliefnet. 

404? Read This

Since we're most of us are texting nowadays, this list of net lingo should be required reading. Your thumbs will thank you.

(It's the place to go IMHO. CYA.)

I Want To Pay Off Every Bit Of Your Debt

There was something about that subject line that I found impossible to resist. The pay off to opening the spam was this brilliant piece of writing:

Everyone is in debt since the gas pricing and the economy although I know the secret to make it through including I can tell you the answer for no cost. You'll be free of your hard times quickly.

Love it.

A Total Failure

Speaker Pelosi slips a shiv into our Idjit in Chief. Bless his heart.

21st-Century Cicero

New York magazine's Sam Anderson examines the steep decline in American presidential oratory across the 20th century…and how Obama has already stemmed the tide.

Choice cut:

Raise High the Rafters
A major reason that Obama’s rhetoric seems to soar so high is that our expectations have sunk so low. In a new book, The Anti-Intellectual Presidency, Elvin T. Lim subjects all the words ever publicly intoned by American presidents to a thorough statistical analysis—and he finds, unsurprisingly, an alarmingly steady decline. A century ago, Lim writes, presidential speeches were pitched at a college reading level; today, they’re down to eighth grade, and if the trend continues, next century’s State of the Union addresses will be conducted at the level of “a comic strip or a fifth-grade textbook.” (“Iran’s crawling with bad guys: BAP!”) Since 1913, the length of the average presidential sentence has fallen from 35 words to 22. Between Nixon and the second Bush, the average presidential sound bite shrank from 42 seconds to 7. Today’s State of the Unions inspire roughly 30 seconds of applause for every 60 seconds of speech. Although it’s tempting to blame the sorry state of things on the current malapropist-in-chief, Bush is only the latest flower (though, obviously, a particularly striking one) on a very deep weed. Our most brilliant presidents, Lim says, often work hard to seem publicly dumb in order to avoid the stain of elitism—amazingly, Bill Clinton’s total rhetorical output checks in at a lower reading level than Bush’s. Clinton’s former speechwriters told Lim that their image-conscious boss always demanded that his speeches be “more talky”; today, he’s widely remembered as a brilliant speaker who never gave a memorable speech.

Obama seems to have taken the opposite tack: He’s a Clinton-style natural who flaunts the artifice of his speeches and refuses to strategically hide his intelligence. Compared with his rivals, Obama’s skill-set seems almost otherworldly. His phrases line up regularly in striking and meaningful patterns; his cliché ratio is, for a politician, admirably low; his stresses and pauses seem dictated less by the usual metronome of generic political speech than by the actual structures of meaning behind his words. He tolerates complexity to such an extent that he’s sometimes criticized as “professorial,” which allows him to get away with inspirational catchphrases that would sound like platitudes coming from anyone else. His naïve-sounding calls for change are persuasive largely because he’s already managed to improve one of our most intractable political problems: the decades-old, increasingly virulent plague of terrible speechifying. The signature project of his candidacy—before health care or housing or Iraq—seems to be the reuniting of presidential discourse with actual, visible thought. It is not a trivial achievement.

Another:

Brilliant policy requires brilliant public discourse. If you can think your way through a sentence, then you can think your way through a policy paper—or a 3 A.M. phone call.

And another:

My relationship to Obama has been a complex cycle of enthusiasm canceled immediately by self-correcting cynical objections, canceled by self-correcting enthusiasm, canceled again by the cynicism, canceled by the enthusiasm. Is he really this good, I wonder constantly, or do we just need him to be? The speech that finally tipped my inner scale decisively toward belief was his least decorative: no refrain, little alliteration, no audience exploding at shouted catchphrases—just the man himself standing there solemnly, neutralizing the hysteria of a potentially career-killing scandal with the naked power of grown-up thought. With his race speech, Obama chose the riskiest path in American politics: to be conspicuously thoughtful. It would have been like Clinton, in 1998, giving a long contextualizing address to the nation about human sexuality, the international status of adultery, etc. It was one of the most encouraging political moments I’ve ever experienced. [emphasis mine]

An Honest Racist

Slate writer Debra Dickerson confesses to and examines her racism.

Choice cut:

Racist Like Me
In a nation riven to its very core by race, I appear to be the only remaining racist. Off and on, I'm homophobic and anti-Semitic, too, but mostly, I'm racist. Yet unlike the rest of you, I'm honest about it.

A Bright Day

Went to see The Dark Knight last night and let me tell you it's every bit as good as the reviews. I won't give my own review other than a full-throated rec and to say that the score by Hans Zimmer is utterly superb. 

Out for a late-night walk last night, it occurred to me that the real driving dilemma of 2008 isn't Obama or McCain—a no-brainer, the outcome of which is an increasingly foregone-seeming conclusion. No 

the real question of 08, the real hard call is…which super hero flick was better: Iron Man or The Dark Knight. Iron Man or Batman? Robert Downey, Jr. or Christian Bale?

If Hollywood keeps churning movies of this quality I'll be forced to reevaluate my long-held understanding of that town's (in)ability to tell a good story.

Underwater Elsie

A rarely seen translucent cow fish.

Dreams of Colbert Nation

Had the weirdest dreams last night. Dreams within dreams. Waking and waking again, but still in dreamland, like those nested Russian dolls. The longest running series was of me grieving over the unexpected death of Stephen Colbert. In the first of the series, I remember thinking about him dying just as I was dropping off to sleep. Even as I had the thought, I wondered what would make me think that. Upon waking from that night of dream-sleeping, I had the strong intuition that he had in fact died and that I had felt it psychically the night before. I started bawling uncontrollably. I couldn't bear the thought of this huge comedic voice-of-a-generation-type dying so young. It just seemed so unfair and unacceptable, that I convulsed in sobs.

Worse, I couldn't confirm whether my intuitive hit was correct. Finally, when I ran into friends and family they confirmed his death, but none of them—nobody—seemed to care much. I tried to find some news online or on cable to really confirm, but couldn't. I was damn near incapacitated with grief over this man I've never met and am not that big a fan of. (I mean I like him a lot, but this was over the top.) Still, I couldn't understand why no one else cared, or at least cared enough about me to say some sympathetic words.

Anyway, this kept up from one dream or dream segment to another. The combination of lack of reliable information, a deep unbearable grief over a public figure, and the apathy of my friends when what I needed was sympathy or empathy was truly bizarre and left a really nasty taste in my mouth.

Western Spaghetti

A truly incredible stop-motion short from The Twisted Films of PES.



Many more here. My favorite is Pee-Nut.

One Badass Bunny

An American Tradition

232 years of mudslinging.

With the presidential nominees all but official, partisans on both sides are targeting their campaigns -- and that inevitably means negative ads. Lately they have come in the form of unsolicited e-mails portraying Barack Obama as a Muslim or charging John McCain with abandoning his disabled first wife. Yet, though we decry it, negative campaigning is as much a part of our political tradition as fireworks on the Fourth of July.

Since the time of John Adams and Thomas Jefferson, successful politicians have sought to sanctify their candidate and demonize their opponent. After three largely nonpartisan elections, the first campaign for president, in 1800, pitted Adams against Jefferson. Patriots in the best sense of the word, both men were brilliant, successful lawyers who stood out among the surviving heroes of the American Revolution. Devoted family men, they had served their states and country during the war and held high positions in George Washington's administration.

Well, I Declare, II

More on the Declaration. 

Choice cut:

On this Independence Day, as we pay annual homage to the Declaration of Independence for which Thomas Jefferson gets most of the credit for authoring, let's not forget the signal contribution made by Benjamin Franklin -- entrepreneur, scientist, diplomat, statesman and, apparently, wordsmith.

If not for Franklin, one of the most famous parts of the Declaration would likely read, "We hold these truths to be sacred and undeniable."

Franklin, a member of the Continental Congress committee charged with creating the document, had a better idea. He crossed out the words "sacred and undeniable" and substituted "self-evident."

Well, I Declare

Who'd a thunk? The Declaration of Independence didn't just come pouring forth whole and complete from Jefferson's genius mind. Here are pics of earlier revisions: 

And a link or two for more info. 

Happy I-Day!

Maybe someone can forward this to the members of the Bush Administration.

IN CONGRESS, JULY 4, 1776
The unanimous Declaration of the thirteen united States of America

When in the Course of human events it becomes necessary for one people to dissolve the political bands which have connected them with another and to assume among the powers of the earth, the separate and equal station to which the Laws of Nature and of Nature's God entitle them, a decent respect to the opinions of mankind requires that they should declare the causes which impel them to the separation.

We hold these truths to be self-evident, that all men are created equal, that they are endowed by their Creator with certain unalienable Rights, that among these are Life, Liberty and the pursuit of Happiness. — That to secure these rights, Governments are instituted among Men, deriving their just powers from the consent of the governed, — That whenever any Form of Government becomes destructive of these ends, it is the Right of the People to alter or to abolish it, and to institute new Government, laying its foundation on such principles and organizing its powers in such form, as to them shall seem most likely to effect their Safety and Happiness. Prudence, indeed, will dictate that Governments long established should not be changed for light and transient causes; and accordingly all experience hath shewn that mankind are more disposed to suffer, while evils are sufferable than to right themselves by abolishing the forms to which they are accustomed. But when a long train of abuses and usurpations, pursuing invariably the same Object evinces a design to reduce them under absolute Despotism, it is their right, it is their duty, to throw off such Government, and to provide new Guards for their future security. — Such has been the patient sufferance of these Colonies; and such is now the necessity which constrains them to alter their former Systems of Government. The history of the present King of Great Britain is a history of repeated injuries and usurpations, all having in direct object the establishment of an absolute Tyranny over these States. To prove this, let Facts be submitted to a candid world.

He has refused his Assent to Laws, the most wholesome and necessary for the public good.

He has forbidden his Governors to pass Laws of immediate and pressing importance, unless suspended in their operation till his Assent should be obtained; and when so suspended, he has utterly neglected to attend to them.

He has refused to pass other Laws for the accommodation of large districts of people, unless those people would relinquish the right of Representation in the Legislature, a right inestimable to them and formidable to tyrants only.

He has called together legislative bodies at places unusual, uncomfortable, and distant from the depository of their Public Records, for the sole purpose of fatiguing them into compliance with his measures.

He has dissolved Representative Houses repeatedly, for opposing with manly firmness his invasions on the rights of the people.

He has refused for a long time, after such dissolutions, to cause others to be elected, whereby the Legislative Powers, incapable of Annihilation, have returned to the People at large for their exercise; the State remaining in the mean time exposed to all the dangers of invasion from without, and convulsions within.

He has endeavoured to prevent the population of these States; for that purpose obstructing the Laws for Naturalization of Foreigners; refusing to pass others to encourage their migrations hither, and raising the conditions of new Appropriations of Lands.

He has obstructed the Administration of Justice by refusing his Assent to Laws for establishing Judiciary Powers.

He has made Judges dependent on his Will alone for the tenure of their offices, and the amount and payment of their salaries.

He has erected a multitude of New Offices, and sent hither swarms of Officers to harass our people and eat out their substance.

He has kept among us, in times of peace, Standing Armies without the Consent of our legislatures.

He has affected to render the Military independent of and superior to the Civil Power.

He has combined with others to subject us to a jurisdiction foreign to our constitution, and unacknowledged by our laws; giving his Assent to their Acts of pretended Legislation:

For quartering large bodies of armed troops among us:

For protecting them, by a mock Trial from punishment for any Murders which they should commit on the Inhabitants of these States:

For cutting off our Trade with all parts of the world:

For imposing Taxes on us without our Consent:

For depriving us in many cases, of the benefit of Trial by Jury:

For transporting us beyond Seas to be tried for pretended offences:

For abolishing the free System of English Laws in a neighbouring Province, establishing therein an Arbitrary government, and enlarging its Boundaries so as to render it at once an example and fit instrument for introducing the same absolute rule into these Colonies

For taking away our Charters, abolishing our most valuable Laws and altering fundamentally the Forms of our Governments:

For suspending our own Legislatures, and declaring themselves invested with power to legislate for us in all cases whatsoever.

He has abdicated Government here, by declaring us out of his Protection and waging War against us.

He has plundered our seas, ravaged our coasts, burnt our towns, and destroyed the lives of our people.

He is at this time transporting large Armies of foreign Mercenaries to compleat the works of death, desolation, and tyranny, already begun with circumstances of Cruelty & Perfidy scarcely paralleled in the most barbarous ages, and totally unworthy the Head of a civilized nation.

He has constrained our fellow Citizens taken Captive on the high Seas to bear Arms against their Country, to become the executioners of their friends and Brethren, or to fall themselves by their Hands.

He has excited domestic insurrections amongst us, and has endeavoured to bring on the inhabitants of our frontiers, the merciless Indian Savages whose known rule of warfare, is an undistinguished destruction of all ages, sexes and conditions.

In every stage of these Oppressions We have Petitioned for Redress in the most humble terms: Our repeated Petitions have been answered only by repeated injury. A Prince, whose character is thus marked by every act which may define a Tyrant, is unfit to be the ruler of a free people.

Nor have We been wanting in attentions to our British brethren. We have warned them from time to time of attempts by their legislature to extend an unwarrantable jurisdiction over us. We have reminded them of the circumstances of our emigration and settlement here. We have appealed to their native justice and magnanimity, and we have conjured them by the ties of our common kindred to disavow these usurpations, which would inevitably interrupt our connections and correspondence. They too have been deaf to the voice of justice and of consanguinity. We must, therefore, acquiesce in the necessity, which denounces our Separation, and hold them, as we hold the rest of mankind, Enemies in War, in Peace Friends.

We, therefore, the Representatives of the united States of America, in General Congress, Assembled, appealing to the Supreme Judge of the world for the rectitude of our intentions, do, in the Name, and by Authority of the good People of these Colonies, solemnly publish and declare, That these united Colonies are, and of Right ought to be Free and Independent States, that they are Absolved from all Allegiance to the British Crown, and that all political connection between them and the State of Great Britain, is and ought to be totally dissolved; and that as Free and Independent States, they have full Power to levy War, conclude Peace, contract Alliances, establish Commerce, and to do all other Acts and Things which Independent States may of right do. — And for the support of this Declaration, with a firm reliance on the protection of Divine Providence, we mutually pledge to each other our Lives, our Fortunes, and our sacred Honor.

Poem Of The Day

From Michael Kerr over at Melancholy Sideshow:

Wealth

Thank you for

the box

of diamonds

I can tell you worked

hard

on the label